Kristen is the cover of the August issue of American Marie Claire magazine and the actress gave an interview where she talks about her childhood, beauty and about being at peace with itself. Check out:
Kristen kicks back
After intense years in the public eye, Kristen Stewart, star of American Ultra is moving on doing something for the first time unthinkable to her, learning to let go.
It is a humid evening in downtown Atlanta, and Kristen Stewart is located in Saltwood Charcuterie & Bar at The Loews Hotel, and their little legs are dangling free as she talks about the women's prison. Not a penitentiary in the style of Orange is the New Black - it's a kind of psychological and social confinement that all women feel at various points in their lives, when they expect smiled, pleasing, support, accept, be gracious, tolerate, ask excuses, bow down, be happy. Stewart, 25, knows well about the women's prison: how a woman can be punished for not following the line for not reflect what a culture considers that it should not be "I believe the operative words are: affordable, easy and hassle free, "she says rolling her eyes exaggeratedly.
Stewart, in town filming military drama of Ang Lee, Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk, is not, and never will be, any of these things. She spent years being criticized for uncomfortable poses on the red carpet, or not shine talk show, or daring to have desires beyond the public pointed to her because they believed they had the right to shape their personality, since it She was a young girl in a series of movies based on best-selling books. Finally, she decided to embrace the rebels labels thrown in their way and say, "Fuck it all!"
"I Fired in my universe," she admits with a grin, "and I watched it burn." Stewart lowers his head, pulling the hem of her simple black sweatpants. Toss away a mosquito. Pull a fallen half in her Converse sneakers. "Frankly," she says at last, lifting her chin and taking a sip of his vodka tonic, "was a very traumatic period in my early 20s who started something in me which was more," she pauses, and then find the word "fierce."
She chooses not elaborate, and she need not worry. The public scrutiny of his personal life is relentless, unpacked the details and delivered to the media as if it was bird food when the tabloids wreaked havoc on their long-standing relationship in 2012, she issued a sincere apology, but lower your sword did not help to calm the masses, and Stewart thinks unlikely to go this route in the future. "Women are always apologizing. I do this all the time. We have this natural desire to please", she says.
As in the sketch of Amy Schumer, where a group of women is nothing more than apologize for every breath, Stewart understands the stress of waiting seem generous until it accelerates its own selflessness.
"It's strange because it is this instinct that makes us great and admirable," she explains. "Women bring us. But it's annoying that what makes us worth our weight is what comes our way. "She sighs. "Lately, I have less ugly [makes a sharp voice crying] 'I'm sorry' and more 'no. Fuck. Jesus. '"
Stewart takes another sip of his cocktail, the release of leaving his old personality back is a thing to behold. "The public kind of burned me at the stake," she says. "But okay, I can handle it. I'm not dead. "
The actress grew up in the heart of Woodland Hills, California, with parents in the industry (his father is stage manager and producer, his mother is a script supervisor and director) and three brothers. She was fiercely competitive as a child, going toward the track, football, basketball - . "Kinetic energy I had for most of my life" any output for
She recalls an incident in elementary school when his physical wrapped her well. "There was this girl, and she did that thing where she took other girls by the hair and pushed. Once, she was getting close to our group and I was like, 'NO! You want to do this? "Thinking, I'll never be able to support it," Stewart laughs. "I was protecting my little girl did not punch as hard as mine. But actually, it ended things. "
A self-described tomboy in elementary school, washed face and following an ambivalent fashion, Stewart fought when he made 13 and "suddenly was no longer cool to be one of the boys." She never forgot a time in adolescence when a friend announced "high, in front of all our group, 'Kristen is not a girl. What is it? 'And I just died. It was a totally cliché collapse and insecure when I was like 'I hate shit out of me.' "
Stewart cringes at the memory. "Many people say, 'Oh, must have been very easy for you.' You think because I'm an actress I did not have a normal progression of self-hatred?"
"I have an incredible radar for certain types of shit."
In the same year 'I hate myself', she officially left school to build her career (she started with a role on TV with 9 years), reaching maturity before our eyes in films such as Panic Room and Twilight Saga. "I was 17 when I was doing Twilight. It was the first time I traveled alone. I was like, 'finally' "She loved the autonomy because it never felt like a child in the first place". When I was younger, I really wanted to stay with adults, to be treated like one. I was the most open, advanced and confident child. I'm still trying to get back to that. "Early on, she feels the effects of any form of treat. "I was always like, 'I'm fine, I'm fine,' long before being."
In retrospect, it may have dealt with things that bothered her differently. "There were things I did not tell my mom when I was 5, that if I had just said 'I'm so scared about it,' she would have said 'do not get, no big deal.' And then I would have been 'Oh, I get it.' I'm sticking with my kids, 'tell me what happened, talk to me.' Knowing that might have something I could handle easily for them, but they need to tell you. "
Despite his "goal was never to be extremely successful in terms of money and recognition," his adolescence direct work launched Stewart for A-List. With global success and exposure came a new level of bullying and humiliation.
"When I met Kristen, we were doing New Moon," recalls the actress Dakota Fanning, who also played Cherie Currie singer Joan Jett Stewart in The Runaways (2010). "Everyone is misunderstood. But it was on another level with Kristen. At that time, she realized that she did not care. But knowing her, I knew she cared too much. That bothered her, people thought they knew who she was. "
"Among my 15 and 20 years, was very intense," Stewart thinks. "I was constantly anxious. I was kind of mad about control. If I did not know how something was done, I got sick, or me or inhibited locked me in a way that was very debilitating. "
She pronounced the last word in exasperation and says she's just learning now, after 16 years in the industry, to manage the speeding train your brain to build healthy emotional boundaries, to know what she does not know.
"At some point, you just let it go and let live your life. I finally I managed it and with much of life, "she says. "I've lived enough for a young person, and I did it myself - but I got the other way no longer closed, but strong. I have an ability to persevere that I had not before. It's like when you fall very strong guy. "She claps her hands together. Smack! "And next time you're like, 'Yes, what then? I already fell face before. '"
"The thing about Kristen is that whatever she does, she lives, eats and sleeps so," said Fanning. "It's never 'oh, this could be cool.' She's always in."
With his next film, American Ultra, directed by Nima Nourizadeh (Project X) and co-starring Jesse Eisenberg, Stewart brings his intensity for comedy for the first time. She is not so worried about being very funny while celebrating that "this is the first movie I've done in a long time which is just funny as hell."
Stewart Eisenberg knows since she was 17, when they were both cast in Adventureland in 2009. "Kristen is more self-conscious than most people you'll meet at her age," he says. "She's in a profession where you are made to wonder, women more than men. She was always very intuitive. We share a claim of dismissal. And we both take very seriously what we do. "
Although she is trying to keep free drama of his world, Stewart not totally abandoned his emo side. She also reads and writes poetry. She still cries when listening to Van Morrison. "I used to be ashamed about how I cry all the time," she says. "Now, I think it's a gift can feel things."
Although the lack of understanding still annoy her - "I'm always saying things that do not mean. Like, 'oh my God, it went wrong. That sounded stupid. '"- Stewart achieved peace with his public image. More critically, it achieved peace with herself.
"I needed to take slapped a few times to learn this lesson. But I would not trade, to be honest, "she says smiling. "I'm really proud to be able to move on and not fall out of mental crater. This is a new thing for me. Age made me smarter and calmer. And that's fucking amazing. "
After finishing his dinner, Stewart observes the skyline of Atlanta. She takes her hair, put extensions for Billy Lynn, his forehead with some irritation. In the film, based on the novel by Ben Fountain, she played the sister of a soldier in Iraq, Billy Lynn (newcomer Joe Alwyn), who is on a tour victory back home in Texas.
"I cut my hair when I made 23," she says. "The effect was amazing." When asked to elaborate, his words could not have been faster. "My hair was like a crutch. I looked "sexy", no matter the situation. I could hide behind it. When I did not have all that hair, I had to leave my face appear. I felt more confident than had feeling in a long time. And it was very good. It was like not having your iPhone for a few months. It was the same feeling of liberation. It seems so obvious, but it was as if my hair made me feel like a 'real girl'. Like I was pretty and feminine. I do not know why I valued it so much, like I had to prove something. "
Stewart breathes heavily, press. "Every guy in my life, people I respect," she says pointing to the extensions, "are telling me 'God, Kristen, you look great now.' It's like, wow. "
"Maybe for most people, the hair is just more beautiful," she admits. "But what then? Your goal in life is to be desirable? That's boring as hell. "
It's getting late, and Stewart have to wake up early. As she slips from his bar stool, a cheap passes through it. She is frightened, and then observe the insect the size of your thumb, tilting her head for a closer inspection. "We do not like large cockroaches in California," she observes wonder. A waitress comes over and asks if Stewart "will kill?"
"Oh, no," Stewart sighs. "I mean, why would I do that?" Instead, she gently diverts. Then she moves on to advanced steps, without bothering to look back.
Words chosen
On responsibility: "My plate is never clean. I like pressure. I'm constantly putting me in incredibly uncomfortable to see if I can go through them. "
About pretend: "I feel like that's the only way I'm good at anything. I play golf very well. I do the best imitation of Tiger Woods I can, and suddenly, my play is completely right. "
About the best advice she ever received: "Patti Smith told me to always take care of my teeth and lungs."
About your idea of hell: "A dinner with the wrong crowd. The airport, which sucks, because it used to be one of my favorite places in the world to sit and people watch. "
About writing songs: "I play guitar and drums, but I do not arranged the whole thing of music and poetry. I think I'm very intimidated, and if I do not do something very well, so I do not want to do. "
About who she envy: "I really envy people that know how to dance. I was in a bar in Seoul with drag Isabelle Huppert, who can dance. And I dont. And I was like, 'that ass up. Dance. 'And I just could not. "
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